I admit that it hurt a little bit, you know? If you were told you were boring, how would you feel?
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I know I’m not perfect, but at least I don’t go labeling people so negatively especially if I don’t know them too well. This happened more than a year ago but I remember the incident like it happened only yesterday. Secondly, I felt bad to be labeled as “boring.” Just because I’m reserved, it doesn’t mean I’m not interesting. While we worked together, we never had a personal relationship. While it wasn’t a direct attack, I felt really offended.
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I looked at her with raised eyebrows, but she just fiddled with her wristband. If you have a boring personality, it won’t suit you.”) If you have a boring personality, hindi babagay.” (“It figures. Lady: “You want to borrow this?” (points at her red leather wristband with studs and spikes) One particular lady decided she wanted to help me get the team spirit. We had to wear the color red as part of our group’s “look,” but I wasn’t wearing red (that’s a different story). Some colleagues and I were getting ready for a presentation. Maybe you just don’t know that person well enough. We need to tell these stories, we can help others realize what’s happening, stop it, and make sure it doesn’t happen again.There’s no such thing as a boring person. I have told the story about my bully to others and though I can’t make her stop, people know what she does. Those are only two stories if you ask, everyone has a story they can tell about bullying they’ve had done to them, have done themselves, or have seen happen to someone else. Even if he doesn’t even know about this and she didn’t realize what she said, she is a bully. I didn’t explain this to her but only because people want to be treated like people and let’s face it, disabled people are treated differently. It hurt hearing that this girl judge him without really knowing why he is the way he is. Our moms made a connection back when they met because his mom was going through the same thing that mine did years ago, mothering a son with Asperger’s syndrome. I’d gone to school with him since Kindergarten and probably know things about him that no one else does. I recently overheard a girl talking about how she’d been asked to a dance, a high compliment in the teenage world, by “a total nerd.” When asked who, I was shocked by her answer. Boys may be more physical, but girls are mean and the words cut deep, lasting so much longer than the black eye a boy may receive.
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People assume that boys are more commonly bullies because they use their fists, but I stand to argue. She blocks me out of groups, tells me that I can’t talk to certain people, tells me I’m a bad person when I do, knocks down my achievements because “it’s not nice to rub things in people’s faces”, and makes other friends hate me because of her spite. Jealousy over little things started to kick in and suddenly I went from best friend to worst enemy. Someone that I used to call my best friend. For me, my bully is a person that no one would expect. This topic hits home for me, like I’m sure it does for so many other teenagers.
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Have you ever thought about bullying being abuse? I once heard the decision of whether to try to stop bullying as: if you knew that someone was being abused by their spouse, would you tell them that they need to get help? Being in an “abusive” friendship is the same thing. Do people always realize that they’re being bullied or that they’re bullying someone else? Maybe not, but does that mean that it isn’t actually happening, just because neither person seems no notice? Bullying is defined by Webster’s dictionary as “To treat abusively”. No matter what people may say, everyone, every person out there, has been on at least one side of bullying.